In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate

In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate
Al-Quran (30:30)

So direct your face toward the religion, inclining to truth. [Adhere to] the fitrah of Allah upon which He has created [all] people. No change should there be in the creation of Allah. That is the correct religion, but most of the people do not know.

فَأَقِمْ وَجْهَكَ لِلدِّينِ حَنِيفًا فِطْرَةَ اللَّهِ الَّتِي فَطَرَ النَّاسَ عَلَيْهَا لَا تَبْدِيلَ لِخَلْقِ اللَّهِ ذَلِكَ الدِّينُ الْقَيِّمُ وَلَكِنَّ أَكْثَرَ النَّاسِ لَا يَعْلَمُونَ
[Al-Imran 3:8] "[Who say], "Our Lord, let not our hearts deviate after You have guided us and grant us from Yourself mercy. Indeed, You are the Bestower."

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Pondering about our purpose of life

It’s depressing that a large portion of my day is spent on working. It is such a waste of life especially if it takes me away from the things that I love like going to visit family, gaining knowledge, reading, devoting more time for worship and things Islamic. It is difficult  to be passionate about anything else and since at the moment I am applying to graduate school I don’t know even know how to decorate my application with a “flowery” testimony of my passion for whatever I want to study. I feel like an empty shell. Don’t know how to describe the feeling. The reason being, ultimately my purpose in life is not to attain a certain career position. All of this stuff is only a means. My real purpose is to worship Allah. Yes, it’s that simple. Many “Muslims” don’t like to realize that and even if some do testify to this, deep inside they feel otherwise. The reason being again is because they have been influenced by a narcissistic world. That to acknowledge that we are at the disposal of our Creator and something simple as doing sujud (prayer-prostration) can be humiliating.

Yes, our purpose in life is to worship Allah! And for me this makes life so much easier. I must remind myself constantly because this life easily consumes me.  Wish everyone knew this and would stop putting a facade that all this junk is so important. I attended a seminar today. Subhana’Allah some people get so hard core into these things that it comes as a shock to me everyday. Masha’Allah they have much knowledge but not sure how much it will benefit them when it WILL really matter, the Day of Judgment. Does no one care about their souls?

Anyways, so today I hung out with my cousin and I don’t remember what I said that she responded that life is great and all worth it. My mother says something similar to that too, “la vida es tan rica (this life is so great).” To which I find it odd to have such feelings towards it. When we tell others how we aught to be grateful to Allah for our lives, the same people feel that there is nothing to be grateful about in their lives yet those people would do anything to stay alive. This life can only be great when we switch our perspective that this life is our currency for the hereafter. Even if one thought this life is about enjoying one self and seeking pleasure I don’t see how it’s enough to overlook the reality of life and its trials. In addition this life is cheap compared to what our Creator has in store for his righteous believers.

While looking at my agenda today I also realized how there seems to be no barakah in my time. Don’t know how to feel about that. I become depressed at the thought that perhaps because I am not beloved to Allah or due to the condition of my heart or my sins I have no barakah, I lose hope. I don’t like to dwell on such feelings as it makes me less spiritually productive due to feeling hopeless in attaining Allah’s pleasure.

I'm tired, going to bed now, got to wake up early for work and then come back home to sleep early to wake up early to work the next day. What a life Subhana’Allah!